(WSM? people – make sure to read the bottom of this post.

Tracy McGrady is going to have microfracture knee surgery solely so he doesn’t get traded.

He just officially moved into the list on the Top 10 Most Disappointing Players of All-Time, right?)

Alex Rodriguez was peering down the back alleys of the Dominican Republic, and he couldn’t believe what he was about to do.

Alex turned to look at his fake cousin – he was also in disbelief, because he didn’t have a name and wasn’t real. How did he get here?

They’d flown together on a real airplane to get here, to the Dominican. Alex Rodriguez loved airplanes – they were so pure, and just, and graceful, and airplaney.

Not like Alex himself. Not after what he and his fake cousin were about to do, which was something not at all pure, nor just, nor airplaney. It was perhaps graceful, if one were to rearrange the letters of the word into a new word that meant “bole buyer”.

“Hey, esse! Psst! Bole, bole, bole, ariba!”

Alex Rodriguez peered down the alley again, and he knew the moment was at hand.

He, Alex Rodriguez, the golden boy of Major League Baseball, was about to buy bole, the mysterious Dominican energy booster that made you get bigger and stronger, and had to be injected just like steroids, but weren’t steroids.

Natch.

“I’m so young and naive…” Alex said to his fake cousin, which meant he was saying it to himself. In any case, he had said it out loud, which had made the bole dealer giggle.

The giggle scared Alex Rodriguez, because it was the kind of giggle that was a precursor to increased muscle mass through illegal means.

Alex stood up straight, took a deep breath, and then hunched back down. This made him an inch shorter, which perhaps, along with his fake beard and Sherlock Holmes costume, would keep anyone from recognizing him.

Recognition is when people know who you are.

Even as he watched his foot step forward, Alex Rodriguez couldn’t believe he was walking down this alley. But Alex Rodriguez kept walking anyway.

(WSM? people – let me know if you got your DVDs.

I know some have arrived, but a few have gotten kicked back because of “insufficient postage”, which is bizarre because they were all exactly the same and I did it on the machine.

This is kinda why I wanted to do this through Createspace (as seen to your left), but you would’ve had to pay for them, and I couldn’t put those individualized watermarks on that way, either.

With how cursed this movie is, you had to know something would go wrong for inexplicable reasons.)