So let’s start getting those sports blogger interviews out of the closet.
Up today is Cleveland Frowns – they write a blog about an alternate reality where all sports teams are named after facial expressions.
First though – this guy in the picture is like in his 30s – why are you dressing up like french fries? PP thinks he looks delicious, btw.
1) Your logo seems to be some kind of rocket, with a frowning football inside.
Why don’t you change the name of your site to Cleveland Browns Smiling Guys and have a picture of a boot, with a smaller boot inside of the first boot?
We get a lot of questions about the logo. It’s supposed to represent a toilet with a frowning pile of crap inside of it. The eyes of the poo represent the watchful eyes of the Cleveland Fan, who continues to care, despite the steaming heaps that are continually piled on us by our local teams and others.
If our logo had a boot in it, it would be kicking Chief Wahoo and/or Browns owner Randy Lerner hard in the pants. You might be on to something. Maybe we’ll change things up one day.
2) For this next question, pretend I don’t hate dogs. The New Browns feel like a cloned dog to me. It looks and smells and even acts like my dog, but I just can’t connect with it. Will this ever end? Do you feel the same way at all or is it just me?
Yes, we feel something similar about the New Browns, maybe even worse because we like dogs and even a cloned one would probably make us feel better than these Browns do.
As for when it might ever end, we think that at least one but probably both of two different things has to happen.
First, it truly makes us sick that Randy Lerner owns these Browns and it’s hard for us to believe that the Browns could ever have any sustained success under his ownership. An NFL franchise is a most precious thing, especially here in Northeast Ohio, the cradle of professional football, but Randy Lerner doesn’t seem to care much for American football or the City of Cleveland.
He inherited the team from his father, a billionaire New York transplant who helped Art Modell move the team out of town, and seems to be far more interested in the English Premier League Aston Villa soccer club that he owns. We’re not sure that Randy spends more than a whole month in Cleveland in any given year, and wonder if his father ever did.
Why do people who care so little about something that so many millions of others care so deeply about get to own that thing? It’s one of the most fundamentally f*cked up things in our world. It shouldn’t surprise anyone that the Browns are so awful under such circumstances, and we’re not sure why we should expect anything different until those circumstances change. We wonder if eminent domain proceedings might work here.
As for the second thing, anyone who believes in the most basic principles of karmic justice might come to think that no major Cleveland sports team will win a Championship until the Indians stop using Chief Wahoo as a mascot/logo.
If the Red Sox were cursed for trading a guy for whom things worked out awfully well for, and if the Cubs are cursed for not letting a guy bring a goat into the stands at Wrigley Field even though the guy got rich and famous for it, then why wouldn’t all Cleveland teams be cursed for their town’s support of a Sambo-caricature created by white people to represent a politically powerless race of people who white people basically killed off.
We won’t say much more here because we know that folks tend to get irritated by this topic and we’ve written plenty about it over at Frowns, but Curse or no Curse — and how could we ever really know? — it would be awfully nice to have one less thing to worry about in supporting the Browns/Indians/Cavs. It will be an incredible clash between LeBron and the Curse in June. Also, we don’t mind the team name “Indians.” In fact, we like it. It’s the Wahoo cartoon that’s the problem.
This was a trick question. The answer was anything under two sentences or less OMG.
3) I have a stack of Post-It Notes that are different shades of purple. Respond.
Post-It Notes are useful, and purple ones are more likely to stand out amidst clutter. We recommend to anyone with access to a stack of Post-It Notes write in black marker “Check Frowns” on as many of them as you have computers and affix one each to the side of each computer’s screen.
I’m still reading answer #2 OMG AGAIN x2.
By the way, even thought I couldn’t disagree more about Chief Wahoo, I will still say go check out Cleveland Frowns if you like – they seem to be a nice group of peoples.
