Also, if this picture makes you laugh, we will probably get along great.)

I pride myself on being like famous Snoopy drawer Charles Schultz. He said [...]]]> (The WSM? YouTube channel was finally approved a few days ago – go see how nice they look over there. Chapter 5 should be out late tonight.

Also, if this picture makes you laugh, we will probably get along great.)

I pride myself on being like famous Snoopy drawer Charles Schultz. He said that “writer’s block is for amateurs”.

Imagine my raw, savage shock when I read back this IM chat transcript that I was involved with. I’m the one labelled “Brian” – that’s like my IM alias or something.

Girl: What r u reading brian. Should I leave u alone lol

Brian: I am writing now

Girl: Ok

Brian: It is a book that I am writing

Girl: Sweet. How far along are you

Brian: I have three words left – just gotta think them up
Brian: Kinda stuck

Stinks, huh?

What should I do, and can you please finish my book for me? Just throw some three-word combos out there.

I just fell off the energy drink bandwagon by consuming 4 triple-size Monsters in 45 minutes.

I also completely did no writing or anything else [...]]]> UPDATE: Since my Texas request is so awesome, I decided I’d better show what mine came out looking like – it’s at the bottom of the post.

I just fell off the energy drink bandwagon by consuming 4 triple-size Monsters in 45 minutes.

I also completely did no writing or anything else today, ’cause I’ve been cranking out 10 pages a day on this script I need to get done, and it’s kinda fried my brain.

Basically, I’m all wired and caught up on all my reading. Thus, this post.

The Dragonball trailer is out, and there’s not nearly enough Emmy Rossum. The above screenshot reminds me that I’ll be seeing it, though.

Here – read this excerpt from the headline of an MSN Money article:

The Dow finishes at levels last seen in October 2004, but losses are cut substantially at day’s end. The decline is prompted by heavy selling around the world. Crude falls under $88; the dollar soars against the euro. Bank of America will raise $10 billion in new capital.

Some of that sounds like good stuff, doesn’t it? I have no idea.

My friends are all freaked out – I lost all my investments back in like 2001, so I’m generally unaffected by all this stuff. All I know is I like things, and Monster is still in business.

I only watched the Hills one day in my life, but it was a hangover day, and I think I watched 29 episodes in a row or something. Thus, I’m all up on it.

Chalk me up as someone who doesn’t care if they’re useless or untalented, or if it’s fake. Audrina is hot with her look-up-all-the-time face and medical enhancements. And her last name is Patridge, not Partridge.

I just discovered this today! Oh, and Heidi’s good-looking too, even though she’s like a Frankenstein.

One thing about Dallas that’s really super fun is my new 15-year old girlfriend. She’s so hot, and she has a fake ID, and everything we do together is illegal. I even let her drive my car to go buy her wine coolers.

You’re MTV. Certainly you can find something better to write about than, “supporting actor from The Shield says he would be in The Shield movie if they make a The Shield movie”.

Y’know what – 99.99% of the actors in Hollywood would be in the The Shield movie if such a thing existed and they were asked to. In fact, 99.99% of the actors in Hollywood would be in any movie if you asked them to.

There are like maybe 15 actors in the entire world who actually say “no” to things. (In fact, this is a list I’m going to make in another post.)

At least make it interesting, and ask Gary Senise from CSI: NY if he would do it.

I apologize if I turn down your Facebook friend request, but I only use it to be friends with people I actually know, or family, which are also people I know. My brother just signed up today, and my best guess says he will never log in again.

Me and Pencils had a counting contest today, and I won, because he’s a telepathic horse, and this was an “out loud only” counting contest. I tricked him.

Target had The Aviator on 2-disc DVD for $5, and American Psycho for $5. Guess who has both of them now? That’s right – the guy who was in front of me in line, and me! Both of us!

I was like, “Hey! You’re getting The Aviator 2-disc DVD and the American Psycho DVD for $5 each! That’s a good deal I’m taking advantage of, as well!”

He was like, “Look around, pal – this is Dallas.”

I looked around like a pal, and he was right – it was Dallas.

Nobody was home today, so I walked around carrying two cap guns and practicing my acting.

For you old schoolers, the beautiful lady formerly known as Miss Gossip has a new blog of her very ownsome. I don’t remember the exact sequence of events, but I think I “discovered” her, among my many other contributions to the NBA blogosphere. Is this true?

Can you draw the state of Texas off the top of your head? Try – I’ll bet it looks really messed up and you feel sad when the experience is over.

Halloweeeeen ain’t ’til manyana…!

My Texas drawing, from memory:

The big news today for the fifteen American biking fans is that Lance Armstrong [...]]]> (One of the Armenians is literally screaming, “Mush-dee pava-do! Meh-toe!” at the top of his lungs over and over right now – I’m really tempted to just start screaming it out the window in response.)

The big news today for the fifteen American biking fans is that Lance Armstrong is going to ride in the Tour of La France Oh Nine, breaking his vow to retire forever.

I’m gonna go on the assumption that none of those fifteen people are reading my blog and say something offensive: I think Lance Armstrong is a big phony.

I think he used steroids* (or whatever illegal things bikers use), I think he liked having cancer, and I think those yellow bracelets he invented are actually blue bracelets he painted yellow.

Something about him just doesn’t ring true.

I also think I need to get off of CompUSA’s email list, because every single day, they send out these amazing HDTV offers, and one of these days I’m gonna break, ’cause I’m easy.

For example, I was in Target lasterday, and there was this girl looking at a DVD of Short Circuit for only $5. So as I walk by, I go, “Johnny Five no disassemble!”

She laughed a healthy laugh, but I noticed the tragic truth – this was the last $5 copy of Short Circuit. What ensued was a negotiation. I gave her $5 not to buy it, so that I could go ahead and buy it for $5.

It was only after reaching the parking lot that I realized:

a) I’d essentially bought Short Circuit for $10.
OR
b) I’d bought Short Circuit for $5 and this girl’s phone number for $5.

Either one is stupid, because I’ll never watch this DVD, nor will I ever call this girl. (She was a nice girl who was nice-looking, I just never call in these Target situations – I think I just like to know I can get phone numbers at Target if I want to.)

*One of my friends told me I have an unhealthy obsession with steroids – this is absolutely true. I’m dying to be in a position to get offered a role wherein there’s like an ungodly amount of money on the table, but only if I can put on like 20 pounds in the next two months.

This would force me to go ahead and use them, and I could finally get that experience out of the way.