(This seems like a book that is for me to read for sure even though it’s about how to make your farm have modern countertops or something.)
Yesterday I was listening to some Huey Lewis and the News again like my brother is always saying to with his “hey go listen to this right now or I’ll lock you out of the house again” voice that he liked to use when we were being kids.
One of the songs is the happy-go-lucky one about how love can be so powerful and a skateboarding cool guy.
It’s one of the ones that happened in a movie and that movie was Back to Some Future.
Since I was a smaller version of me I always thought it went like this:
Chain your heart,
To a little white girl,
Even when I was that little fella I was thinking “oh man I hope Huey’s grandpa doesn’t own slaves” because that seemed weird in a way that was bad.
Well, just like with my special cucumber/pickle connection, I only did a realization moment here in my adult experience that it’s like this:
Chain your heart,
To a little white dove,
Still that’s not making all my senses click but at least it rhymes in the song now and doesn’t need the Constitution to step in.
Last year, for reasons of my own, I taught my nieces a new mantra for Easter.
It was a simple and joyful, “EASTER IN YOUR FACE!”
They were three at the time – in retrospect, perhaps it was immature of me to do this to (for?) them.
Being that they’re almost four, it’s time to tell them how adults celebrate Easter joy with a new phrase, “EASTER ALL NIGHT!”
It’s not so much a phrase as a party anthem.
Imagine the Black Eyed Peas taking these words and turning them into a song, and you’ll get what I’ll be going for.
Like Fergie sings the first part and then Waylon or Wilbie or whatever their names are sings the after-shout portion.
EASTER ALL NIGHT! (EGGS)
EASTER ALL NIGHT! (EGGS)
EASTER ALL NIGHT! (EGGS)
EASTER ALL NIGHT! (EGGS GOTTA GET EM)
Like all their songs, that’s all there is to it, and it goes on for ten minutes and sells a zillion copies.
I’m told that last year EASTER IN YOUR FACE! came out at completely inappropriate times, and this is why I’m the best uncle ever, and probably shouldn’t consider fatherhood anytime soon.
(To your right – from the cover page of what I am writing at right now.)
A lot of people ask me the classic “what kind of music do you listen to” question when they’re trying to date me.
This is not info I disclose readily – it has to come out in an organic fashion.
For example, from the following, try and figure out if I listen to the 3 musicians named in the title of this post.
Brian: Hey soul sister is on again wtf
Brian: Who sings this I hate it so much
Girl: Train
Girl: Lolol
Brian: Its so girly lol
Brian: Like is Girly Rock a genre now
Girl: Oh mon brion lol
Brian: I blame the Goo Goo Dolls – they started this back in the 90s lol
Girl: Omg themmm
Brian: Hey Jealousy!
Girl: I love that song!!
Brian: when did that come out
Brian: I think it was like 94?
Girl: I don’t know brian I was like [redacted] then
Admittedly, there’s a lot more interesting stuff than musical taste happening in that exchange, such as relationship-based math.
Here’s another go at music.
Brian: Lolol that Pink song “I’m comin up” is on
Girl: Oh god lol
Brian: I haven’t heard this in a long time
Brian: It’s terrible lolol
Brian: Everybody’s dancin and they’re dancin for me!
Girl: Horrible
Brian: I’ll be your operator you can all anytime, I’ll be your connection to the party line!
Girl: We should remember what year it came out and then use that to compare our ages again
Brian: : /
Last one.
Brian: I was at this party one time and Coldplay came on and this dude LOVED them like in a really hipster/snobby way and I kept saying they were originally called Coldburst
Brian: He made me go read their Wikipedia page he was so pissed
Brian: And I was like “yeah they must’ve had it taken off so nobody would find out”
Girl: I don’t believe you
Brian: You weren’t even born yet when they were Coldburst lol
Seriously, Pink has been famous for almost a solid ten years now. I’m trying to think who she compares to historically – like how will she be remembered 20 years from now?
I don’t thunk her music has really transcended anything, but obviously they still play it now and then, and she’s been in the cultural zeitgeist for a good chunk of time.
What does zeitgeist even mean – I’m in over my head again. Did I just call Pink a Nazi?
Look at this eagle, it’s running running running,
Look at this eagle, it may be a hawk!
Look at this eagle, it’s running running running,
Look at this eagle, I wonder if he talk!
Talk eagle talk!
Say something good!
Talk eagle talk!
Do you drink blued!
Look at this eagle, it’s running running running,
Look at this eagle, it has strong legs!
Look at this eagle, it’s running running running,
Look at this eagle, I wonder if he talk!
Talk eagle talk!
Talk about your running!
Talk eagle talk!
I wonder if he talk!
Do you think the eagle can talk and what do you think it would say if it could. Also, is it actually just a hawk that thinks it’s an eagle.
I was thinking about having a good cry the other day, and then because my actoring is a bit rusty, decided to wait, and not do that thing.
Instead, I made this list of actual pieces of commercial media and entertainment that have made me produce tears, be they sadness tears or happiness tears.
BOOKS:
Catcher in the Rye (Like when he catches the rye finally. I think it’s a metaphor -)
Of Mice and Men (When Lenny does his dying.)
MOVIES:
Armageddon (When BW’s friend who has the kid runs up to the kid when they get back to Earf.)
The Grapes of Wrath (The end.)
Wall-E – A couple times.
The Incredibles – When Dash finally lets loose in the jungle.
Team America – I literally was crying with laughing the first time “AMERICA – F–K YEAH!” played.
The Iron Giant – Twice.
Big Fish – the end.
Field of Dream – duh.
TV SHOWS:
Lost (End of last season – I was just overwhelmed in general at the end.)
MUSIC:
N/A
SPORTS:
Cavs (Too many to list – last time was when they finally got to the Finals – Game 6 vs Pistons in 07.)
Browns (First game back in Cleveland in 1999.)
Indians (When they got to the 95 World Series.)
I’m sure there are more – but this is all I can think of right now. I’m sure some music must have made me cry, but I dunno. What commercial fare has made you shed tears the most, and why do you think it did that.
(Go join the WSM? Facebook Page – it’ll be the only place to see the first teaser…on Sept 1.)
More than anything, however, I’ve been scraping my hands against coarse objects trying to figure out where Beyonce’s career will stand in 2015. Ongoing icon of sorts like Diana Ross. Fallen idol like Whitney Houston. Constant reinvention like Madonna.
These are all possibilities, and with the rapid advances in gene therapy, it’s possible she could just be exactly like Beyonce in 2009, who just by chance, is exactly like Beyonce from 2006 and 2003.
What can’t be denied is that Beyonce has left a mark in music history because of Bootylicious, and whenever my girlfriend sings me a lullaby, this is the song I ask her to choose, along with all of the following:
1) Da Doo Ron Ron, The Crystals
2) Wild, Wild West, Will Smith
3) Welcome to the Terrordome, Public Enemy
4) Baby I Need Your Loving, The Four Tops
5) Big Empty, Stone Temple Pilots
6) Monday, Monday, Mama and the Papas
7) Sk8ter Boi, Avril Lavigne
I let her choose the order, but I threaten a permanent break-up if she doesn’t lullaby me each and every song in full.
What songs would you want to have lullabied at you if you were dating my girlfriend. Where do you think Beyonce’s career will be in 2019.
So here’s a fun thing that is for having fun and making jokes.
As you know from the post last week, I was struggling with how to navigate and use MySpace for the Who Shot Mamba? movie.
@CTK1 had explained to me all kinds of ways it could be used, and it was super helpful. The only thing that was missing was the creative angle.
I couldn’t just put up a page for the movie, because one, I didn’t know what to do with such a page that isn’t already being done elsewhere.
Two, I find it nearly impossible to make connections on MySpace in the same genuine manner one can elsewhere. There had to be some kind of unique entertainment value/experience that only MySpace could provide.
Anyway, like at 3am a couple nights back, I get this email from @DJCoe. He did the (kick butt) musical score and much of the sound editing for WSM?, so he knows the material as well as anyone.
I was gonna post the email here, but now I can’t find it. Anyway, the gist of it was, “If you think MySpace is so retarded, why don’t you just get retarded on there.”
I’m liking it so far, probably for all the wrong reasons – I don’t think this is what the MySpace Commander had in mind. If I basically “open-sourced” this to about 10-15 people, would that be of interest? We could see who can add the most retarded content and then the having-fun is happening.
Let me know what you think, and if you have any pictures/videos you want me to add, put a link in the comments. (Just keep it PG-13 – thanks!)
In celebration of me and @ColleenBurns having impending BFFness – you know you can feel it – here’s the until-now unrevealed to the public soundtrack to Prelude to a Super Airplane.
Those of you who have read the book know when in the narrative you’re told to play this ominous, doomsy, track. The rest of you have sad faces.
The three composers are:
Daniel J. Coe – he did the score to WSM?, and saved that movie in more ways than one. Like, seven ways.
Rob Gokee – I’ve known Rob for like three years now. He got me on Twitter, so in some ways he saved my life. (Rob on Twitter.)
Kevin Samuels – Kevin is my lost brother from another life. This is the guy I lived with back in September, when I was subletting in that Armenian building. We share the exact same taste in everything, to an uncanny degree. (Kevin on Twitter.)
I have interviews with all these guys also, which one day I’ll post – I swear. I implore you to listen to this all the way through – Kevin’s track is maybe the most doom-laden of all.
There were an unnatural number of people who found their way here by searching for my name.
I also will be really happy if this becomes the place to find out the story of Dr. Frankenstein’s fear of his own monster, because that’s like literature.
I really can’t comment on the Cavs-Pacers game much. They just need to get to the All-Star break and regroup/refocus.
My old favorite Cavs message board seems to think our inside presence is suddenly weak, but I would contend the lack of offensive rebounding lately is because we’ve become almost exclusively a jump-shooting team.
This started when Z went down, and hasn’t changed since he came back. Look at them on offense sometimes – you’ll often have five guys on the perimeter.
I had no idea LeBron had 43 points lasterday btw. I would’ve pegged him at 24, with a viewing of Madagascar 2 mixed in during the second quarter.
If you use WordPress, then you’re used to the upper left corner area having a link to some random blog.
Yesterday there was a link to a post about this whole Rihanna-Chris Brown thing, alleging that the entire fist-fight was over her giving him herpes.
As I like to do sometimes, I left my thoughts.
Brian said,
February 10, 2009 at 7:44 pm
Beyonce is mad now because of Bootylicious not being as popular as it used to be.
Chris Brown likes that song but he doesn’t tell anyone, and especially now because of hitting people.
Bootylicious isn’t even on the charts wtf?
I can’t find the site now – this whole post is blown. The point was, sometimes when everyone is saying one thing, and you say the opposite, it’s funny.
In this case, everyone was saying that Chris Brown doesn’t like Bootylicious, and I was saying that he does, and that’s when a bigger debate started.
Also, someone please block the Girlicious YouTube homepage on my computer.
(If you want to know about the picture above and the fantastic music video I’ve found, just skip to the bottom.)
My sports reading has been pulled way back in recent years, and now I’m going to need to cease popping in at my longtime favorite Cavaliers message board.
I just can’t read stuff like this anymore.
To those who do not believe in a conspiracy to disrespect LeBron and the Cavs unless and until he signs with NY, I have a bridge in Brooklyn that you may be interested in.
All this is fodder and ammunition for class action lawsuit(s) alleging collusion and RICO. How many times has the NBA taken away a triple double? How many teams with the (soon to be) best record have only one all star rep? Even after a player goes down to injury?
Besides the use of bridge cliches, there are multiple people there who believe that LeBron’s triple double was taken away last week for primarily two reasons: [Like here is how to read the rest.]
(This seems like a book that is for me to read for sure even though it’s about how to make your farm have modern countertops or something.)
Last year, for reasons of my own, I taught my nieces a new mantra for Easter.
(To your right – from the cover page of what I am writing at right now.)
So here’s a fun thing that is for having fun and making jokes.
