Brian's Thoughts About Airplanes
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From the category archives:
That’s like an actoring tip. Sorry if this is hard to read.
@InflatableBen is in jail, too. The fact that these two are clearly not really Ben Wallace and Jerry Rice – and never, ever claimed to be – has eluded el Twitter.
Crippling to Team Mamba where Ben is concerned. Very disappointing – hope they clear this up.
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I will get to the important issue of the Who Shot Mamba? iPhone app being available tomorrow. (Click here to go get it in the iTunes Store – it’s 100% FREE.)
In the meantime, old friend Bjorn of Half Broke Hotel shared an article with me about one of my most anticipated films of this year, The Expendables.
The whole thing is pretty amazing, including at least one instance of Sylvester Stallone calling Ivan Drago “bro”.
Then there’s this part.
It features some of the biggest names of the genre – including Arnold Schwarzenegger, 62, Bruce Willis, 54, Dolph Lundgren, 52, Mickey Rourke, 57, Jet Li, 46, and Jason Statham, 37.
It also stars Brittany Murphy, who died in December of a heart attack.
Of course her death isn’t funny, but the article is all about how horrific the stunts were, the “tough legends” that have banded together, and how Stallone fractured his neck during the shoot.
If you read it all the way through, the placement of that sentence and the context makes it seem like she died of a heart attack during the shoot because she couldn’t handle how intense the shoot was.
Am I wrong.
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(WSM? Chapter 2 is up, and contains the film’s lone shot at LeBron. A shot that’s sadly still relevant three years after it was written.)
In lieu of the now-cancelled Fashion Week I was gonna have, here’s the lowdown on all the WSM? intel.
WHERE TO WATCH NOW
The Facebook Page
The Website
The Vimeo Channel
WHERE TO WATCH THAT ISN’T SET UP YET
(Should be by the end of this week – will let you know when it’s ready.)
iTunes
Tivo
Verizon Fios
DVD
We’re doing two DVDs – the first is totally bare-bones and will be available in early-December. Just the movie and the teasers, and maybe a couple extras – I might throw the mess of a script on there, actually.
The second DVD will be available later, if it’s warranted. This would have (probably) a couple commentaries, deleted scenes, bloopers, re-shoots, etc. We have a ton of material that would be really interesting – if you’ve read Prelude to a Who Shot Mamba, you know this.
DOWNLOAD OF THE FULL FILM
This will hopefully be right around the same time as the first DVD is available.
Thanks so much for all the kind words here and elsewhere – the response has been fun to see, and we all super appreciate it. Promise I will get back to more eclectic writing here – just been super busy with all this Moomba business.
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So at the end of this post, there’s an embed for Chapter 1 of the broadband motion picture, Who Shot Mamba?.
Before we get there…
1) This Prelude to a Who Shot Mamba? ebook tells the entire history of the project. From blog, to 5-minute short, to full-length feature film – all in just over 3.5 years! It’s a quick 25-page read, and it’s free and fun.
2) Join the Facebook page – there are screengrabs, cast photos, and hopefully discussions that say things like, “I like this. You people did a good job. Also, you appear deceptively muscular to me.”
3) On the WSM? homepage, you can find links to all of our social networking stuff, and other business of note, including the full release schedule. Basically, we’re weekly for nine weeks, excluding two around X-Mas – we may run some deleted scenes or other fun stuff during that time.
Ummm…thanks to everyone who worked on this, and all of you who stuck with it through its tumultuous birthing process via my old site YAYsports! NBA…here it is. Smiley face.
On a scale of 1-10, how is my important actoring.
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Quick links of the past three days guest posts:
09/15 Chris Illuminati’s Great Moments In Christory: 9 Games For Kids Who Aren’t Yours
09/16 I Have HDD: An Analysis of Your Inspiration (This is like a serious post, so be careful.)
09/17 Jordi Scrubbings’ The Serious Tip: How to Interact With Girls on Twitter
Today I’m over at Half Broke Hotel talking about the time I saw Star Trek in IMAX, and how that time was this week.
This has been a lot of writing – lucky there’s only three and a half more months to go on this blog tour.
Other things of note, and then I promise to get back to the cutting-edge irreverence you crave on Monday.
Dylan Mooney is on Facebook. What happens when he starts to talking to Calvin Stadiums.
Phil Jackson sticking that T-mobile phone in my face is starting to freak me out for some reason. It was fine initially, but now it’s like all weird.
Thanks to all the people who claimed to be mesmerized by the second WSM? teaser:
MCM, 1889ca
Susan Cooper, Buzz Edition
Will Leitch, New York Magazine
Natalie Sitto, Need4Sheed
Jennifer Keene, Who Is Just Like A Cool Chick
JE Skeets, Yahoo! Sports
Amber Osbourne, Destructo Deviations
Henry Abbot, ESPN
Nate Jones, AOL & Jones on the NBA
Jack Kogod, KSK and Deadspin (AKA Unsilent Majority)
A lot of people asked me why these were the chosen ones, and like the answer is “because”. There are also new behind the scenes production photos on the Facebook Page, so like go there and now I will go to sleep.
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This is easily the most pretentiously awesome thing I’ve ever done – please take it as it’s intended, i.e. as pretentiously awesome.
So like sorry I haven’t been around this week, but I have been really active in my social networks, so it’s not like I’m absent.
It’s interesting – like we’re in the process of building the WSM? website, but the Facebook Page is also in existence, and has everything one could want from your own page – easy to create photo galleries, video upload, message board, and more.
On top of that – and of most importance, really – the people are already there, and spreading word is as easy as one click for them. I mean, obviously you need a homepage, but does it really matter if anyone watches it there or somewhere else. I don’t think so.
I dunno – just something to think about wrt all this changing stuff de la 2009. What’s the most pretentiously awesome thing you’ve ever done on a computer.
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Today I want to talk about the TEMPEST again.
The point is, I sneezed twice this weekend, and now I’m worried I messed up my inadvertent nose-job.
TEMPEST was ah-choo.
NAY NAY NAY NAY NAY NAY NAY.
I want to buy my piano a smaller piano. They will be friends. I DO NOT PLAY PIANO.
TEMPEST.
I could show you my CT scan of my head, and it’s not nearly as freaky as I thought it would be.
TEMPEST.
What is your TEMPEST? Please be DRAMATIC.
(Follow me on Twitter here. And go buy me this book by Chris Anderson, FREE – I’m pumped to read it.)
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(In the picture below, @alexiskn shows the first and second best uses for my book – as a placeholder for real books, and as the Tobey Maguire to her Joan Allen home.** You can see that it’s already infected that sad-face copy of Lord of the Flies.)
I was on IMDB looking up information on Robert Downey Jr, and came across 2006’s The Shaggy Dog. From the message board:
I saw this movie about six months ago on a field trip. The only reason that I chose this movie was that I only had four options. There was this girl from my group that was laughing every five minutes. Clearly she has no taste. Anyway, did Tim Allen have to be naked? I mean, what is so wrong with a dog with clothes on?
Someone follows up by pointing out that dogs don’t wear clothes. It turns into a heated discussion about who’s more stupid, and the scientific logic of a human turning into a dog in real life, and whether said dog would wear clothes or not.
This all brings me back to late 2004 or so, a time wherein I didn’t have a blog at all, and occasionally did background work in TV and movies.
You see, I spent about two weeks on The Shaggy Dog, and if you listen really closely, you might hear myself and some girl (as “Courtroom Gallery Members”) screaming, “OH F–K!!! WE’RE ALL GONNA GET AIDS!!! AAAHHHH!!!!!” when we were supposed to be “confused and a little surprised” regarding Tim Allen barking in the middle of court.
I’m not actually onscreen there as more than a shoulder, but I did make it in during the restaurant scene, when Kristin Davis is stood up by her naked dog husband. I’m the guy in the v-neck sweater fake-eating salmon. The twist is that I real-ate five plates of that stuff, and that’s because I was hungry.
I’m sure I have a ton of stories like this, but I’ve largely blocked out the +/-6 months I spent doing background actoring – it’s an awful way to spend time, although highly educational with regard to how sets work.
You can also meet lots of girls, and learn the delicate art of not committing suicide after spending a day around little kids who have better careers than you.
I’ll be at the doctor this afternoon, and will do my best to Tweet the entire thing, as mentioned the other day. First person to correctly guess what the appointment is for wins their own colorful and lifesaving copy of PTSA.
**Reading it is actually the tenth best utilization of the book.
(Follow me on Twitter here.)
(Download the first 55 pages of my epic, pretentious, and stupid book, Prelude to a Super Airplane, here – it’s available in paperback, or iPhone/Kindle for only 1.99.)
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As you know, I’ll never apologize for how much I amuse myself, and sometimes when I amuse myself, I also have actual good ideas.
This popped out of me on Twitter lasterday.
I might start a website called “Idiotic Things I Have Said to Famous People on Twitter”.
I’d probably want to limit it to people in the NBA, just because that doesn’t seem so much like harassment, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be fun. For example, I’ve said all of these purely by accident.
@jalenrose I like when the ball goes through the hoop and goes SWOOSH!
@paulpierce34 Hey Paul not to be forward but my girlfriend said to ask if you would like to have a romantic lunch date with her.
@paulpierce34 I wrote a movie called Paul Pierce: The Movie and in it you are shopping for Happy Birthday presents for your friends.
@THE_REAL_SHAQ What you think of this beat: Boom-boom cheh, da-boom-cheh-cheh, boom-boom-da-doom (in the 09…09) – thx
Okay, so the Brad Radby book – yesterday you got the Foreword. Here’s a link to the Introduction, by none other than Eastham Way.
I want to get into the movies, though. And I would stress, if you’re gonna read this online, do it in order.
While it’s very skip-aroundable in many aspects, there is a definite narrative, especially inside the production notes.
Brad Radby’s first released movie was Dragon’s Game, which came out in 1999. It was the start of a major new franchise for Bruce Willis, wherein he played a college football coach in Hawaii, who was also an action detective.
His main nemesis was always the President, and in the glory days of the franchise, this was a role inhabited by Keanu Reeves. An excerpt from Brad’s own summary of the movie:
When Bruce wakes up he’s in a coffin, and the coffin is hanging off a bridge, and when Keanu blows up the bridge, that’s how he’ll kidnap the scientist from his electric magnet car, and then he’ll get the stolen cold fusion recipe, which the scientist took because Keanu wants to tie the cold fusion to a missile and shoot it at other countries.
Keanu explains this to Bruce, and when Bruce tries to be sneaky and get out of the coffin, Keanu is like “no-no-no” with his finger.
Dragon’s Game was one of the first of these that I wrote, and came from some throwaway thing in PTSA, when I needed to name one of Brad’s movies. At the time, I had no idea what it would be.
The entire book is posted in blog form over there, is downloadable as a pdf, and the paperback version is now available, as well.
(The Amazon one isn’t up yet – as soon as it goes live, I’ma link up this and PTSA so you can get both for some kind of exciting discount. The Kindle version is indeed active.)
And just in case you need to make me feel horrible about my click-thru stats, here’s @ColleenBurns from Twitter – feel free to go meet her instead of reading my free and hilarious book.
In her background picture, she’s like, “Hello! Here I am!”
(Follow me on Twitter here.)
(Download the first 55 pages of my epic, pretentious, and stupid book, Prelude to a Super Airplane, here.)
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So this is book number two: Brad Radby’s Brad Radby: The Complete Filmography (1999-2023).
In the spring of 1998, an unknown director named Brad Radby quietly directed his first movie.
Titled The Exploders, it starred Bruce Willis, Will Smith, and Keanu Reeves…and it went unseen for 15 years.
When it was finally released in May of 2013 as Brad Radby’s The Exploders, the film industry was changed forever.
In the years between, Mr. Radby directed thirty-six other movies, before his alleged death aboard the famed Super Airplane in December of 2012.
Inside these pages, in his own words, Mr. Radby walks you through each of these films, giving valuable insights into the stories, and the stories behind the stories.
Brad loves Mustangs.
Brad Radby’s work has touched us all in some way, and he’s finally returned to tell us how he did it.
A few quick facts, although I’m not going heavy into this until the paperback version is available, which should be Monday or so. (The Kindle version is up and running now, for those of you who have one, or like to read on an iPhone/iTouch.)
1) This is a Prelude to a Super Airplane tie-in, but stands completely on its own. BRBR is extremely accessible to anyone, and if you love movies and/or pop culture of the 90s and ’00s, you’ll love this book.
2) If you’ve read PTSA, then you can stop complaining that it left things hanging. PTSA took place in 2012 – Brad Radby’s Brad Radby takes place in 2023, about a month after the ending of Flight of a Super Airplane, which is a book I will never write.
3) Also for PTSA readers – yes, you’re going to read Brad’s full synopsis and production notes for such works as Brad Radby’s Secret Father, Brad Radby’s The Dating Pill, Spacemappers, and all the rest that were mentioned in there, including what exactly happened when Brad took on the Andreanna Marsupial series.
The best thing is that this book is 100% completely free – you can download a pdf or the full html right now, or you can read it in blog format over there, for those of you who find excessive amounts of Brian Spaeth in one sitting a bit too much.
The blog portion will be rolled out piece-by-piece, and nine such pieces are up right now – I’ll be going through each entry starting next week, and you’ll get what’s essentially a commentary track right here. (Don’t worry, this won’t dominate the site – it’ll be an addendum to each post.)
So why am I giving away an entire book for free? I’ll try and explain that sometime, as well.
Anyway, go over to BRAD RADBY DOT COM and muck around – it’s all really simply set-up and nice and such and such, although I am messing with the format on the blog still.
(Follow me on Twitter here.)
(Download the first 55 pages of my epic, pretentious, and stupid book, Prelude to a Super Airplane, here.)
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