I was talking this weekend with a book reader, and the book they had read was mine.
This was my first book – the one where I admit I’m deceptively muscular.
They were like, “what does that mean” to me in their live broadband video note, and I was wearing a baggy sweatshirt so I showed them this picture.
“Is that even the same guy,” is what their face meant to say, and then they wanted to know some famous people who maybe had this condition, also.
Joel McHale took his shirt off on Community and now he has a DM trophy. Ben Affleck could be DM if he wanted to.
Ryan Reynolds was DM until he just started having his shirt off all the time, which made it undeceptive.
That’s the big-time temptation of being DM. There’s an urge to let everyone know, like how I put in that hazy picture above or how the Force goes bad guy for some people in Star Trek.
Also me and Joel (and Christian Bale sometimes) work really hard to get like this so if you’re naturally muscular or (especially) blatantly muscular, you’re boring.
Go to the dog pound!
I am really having the crazy day this time on my dot com blog. lol
Anyway, most of this week has been spent brooding and being happy about how sad and happy I am. Also, lots of self-important writing.
Over at AOL Fanhouse, I wrote up my problems with LeBron James, and did a podcast with Brett Pollakoff, wherein I talked about LeBron’s Dancing Crisis, Bill Simmons’ basketball book, and of course some Who Shot Mamba? plugging.
At Yahoo!’s Ball Don’t Lie, there’s a small essay about the logistics and fun of shooting at Bill Walton’s house. Couple cool behind-the-scenes pics – I think in that one I’m trying to explain what an Orange Roundie is.
LOL!
What.
At CT Kingston’s blog – otherwise known as @CTK1, I did maybe my favorite Photoshop work I’ve ever done for part of her mega-super-2009-roundup-post.
Thanks also to @DennyMayo, @mfeige, @cjrider, and @thegnc for joining me in that Matt Bullard-based Houston Rockets chat, helping to bring Calvin Stadiums, Petey Skippen, Sherpa, Peter Ovaire, Brad Radby, Russell Slanteer, Monstero, and others to vivid life.
Keep in mind we are twins, but I’ma go ahead and say it – do you want to date my sister?
Here’s the deal – I won’t do anything with it, because there are people who worked on it who haven’t been paid yet.
Details are unimportant and avoid the bottom line: the proverbial buck stops with me on this project, I take full responsibility for it, and the fact that it’s unresolved sixth months later is an unfair, embarrassing, and ugly situation.
These are the initials of everyone who hasn’t been paid:
DG, JM, NJ, CS, SS, CS, JC, and AT.
I’ll link to this up in the 2GG tab above, and knock people off the list as this is taken care of. If you’re one of these people and you have to vent, go ahead and do it right here – I (and I alone) deserve to be bad-mouthed until it’s a closed case.
I learned a couple producering lessons on 2GG for sure, and unfortunately the good and talented people who helped make it have felt a trickle-down effect.
(For the sake of transparency, I also owe my parents about $6,500,000 in “metal anguish fees” for pretty much my entire high school experience.)
I’m thinking about writing a screenplay, blah blah, what should I do, tips, etc blah?
I don’t know why this comes to me, considering my one produced feature credit and my one web series credit, neither of which have been released yet.
Obviously this isn’t all that I’ve written or even had made – it’s just those are the only two that are public in any way.
I suppose it’s because I have a lot of readers who are writers, and I’m all accessible and have perfected the art of pretending to be able to pretend I’m intelligent.
So yeah – I was asked this over the weekend again, and decided to just put my answer up as a post for the long haul.
I’m doing it on Sunday, because a lot of you won’t care about the answers, but it’ll be here to link to in the future.
LeBron better get his stuff together before I accuse him of spending all his time at the movies again.
Yes, he had a triple-double lasterday, but only because he went out of his way to try at his doing rebounding at the end, in order to get said triple-double.
The rest of the game he was acting like Tracy McGrady.
Z being out for a month (my estimate) stinks, so maybe it’s time to do the Wally-for-Brad Miller trade. All goes well, and Wally can be back with CLE by this time next month. He looks like he could use the rest anyway.
I see a lot of music videos at the gym that I’ve never seen before – probably because the gym is the only place I watch music videos.
Anyway, below is where some German chicks called Ultra Flirt try to trick a man into giving them a Ferrari.
I like this because it completely fools you into thinking the girls are hot, plus the whole thing seems like it’s from 1985, but Germanies are really doing this today.
Oh, and it’s a remix of “Heaven is a Place on Earth”, but I don’t think there’s any irony involved in this concept.
I like the part where the robot voice goes, “Let’s go!” and it says “Let’s Go!” on the screen at the same time.
Catchy in its own way, plus at some point, Doc apparently dropped the wife, kids, and choo-choo train. It’s like a continuity mystery.
Okay, so Monday two things will happen.
1) The full lowdown on my book. Excerpts start getting posted Tuesday. If you’re clever enough, you can buy it now.
2) You can start playing Vegetable Trivia Game for real, and it’s the only way to win a free copy of my book, and it can only be done on Twitter. If you’re not following me now, maybe you should go start.
I’ve almost got it figured out, and I knew that was true when I started using it to hit on girls.
There was some debate in the Christmas Household yesterday over whether the Lakers or Celtics were the preferred victors in the Christmas Day Basketball Game.
Reason being, it’d be really fun if the Cavs were the ones to break their winning streak on January 9 in CLE.
Logic ruled out in the end – we’re looking at a team that will probably go no worse than 67-15. You’ve gotta gain in the standings anywhere you can, because there simply won’t be much room to make up games, period.
And so, the Cavs are now 1.5 back, after a scary, Christmas Cookie fueled win over the Wizards. I think LeBron spent most of the day watching Shrek 3.
I thought the pre-game thing was lame – do it with real chalk next time, please.
That said, it’d be awesome if LeBron started throwing confetti in the air himself instead of the chalk from now on.
Moving on. My Christmas Smile is diminished, as I’ve expanded my form up to 205 pounds since coming home. For the record, during 2GG I was 179.
Vain person that I am, I’ll now be trimming away at this – all should be back where it’s supposed to be soon, ie Brian Re-yoked.
I feel like garbage, and I started off with a solid 40 minutes on the elliptical with my prize-winning gym buddy this morning.
Apparently my Christmas post caused some confusion, but that’s why it’s called a tease. Although it says January 6th on there, I’ll actually be revealing the full scoop on January 5th.
Regarding FB, generally I only befriend people I’ve met in person. It’s not that I’m paranoid – it’s that I’m super paranoid. Please don’t take it personally.
Okay, I’m doing Twitter, but I don’t know if I’ll keep up with it. Honestly, anything I have to say to the internet, I usually flesh out right here.
I can’t see doing a “walking down the street” or “typing something into Twitter” or “making out with a bunch of girls at once again”.
I got a haircut yesterday, and it eliminated almost all my black hair left from 2WO G2N G2Y.
I’m kinda torn, because I think I like my hair dark, and plus my sister arrived over the weekend, and she said it looks better dark. I trust her judgment in such matters.
The last thing I want to do is get into some thing whereby I have to do any sort of maintenance on hair, either long or short term.
I suppose the answer to this situation will present itself.
I think my favorite toy of all the nieces’ toys are their Duplo blocks.
A lot of people will tell you that stuff like this is true skill with Legos, but I’ve built like a bunch of these towers (as seen above), and they’re super cool.
The thing is, the person who did the Star Wars thing literally couldn’t achieve what I did with my construct, because he’d keep trying to make it too advanced.
I’m getting some of these blocks for myself as soon as I get back to LA.
Survey please – which of these fonts do you like best?
This is my current status on Facebook, and I have to admit I’ve amused myself again.
Brian Spaeth is a Blackberry American.
There was a day I would’ve ran over to godaddy and reserved blackberryamerican.com asap, coming up with some sort of idea for it that I’d never execute.
Sigh…those were the days.
Speaking of DAYS du YAY, old pal Jordi Scrubbings just emailed and told me a bunch of people are still subscribed to YAYsports! via Google RSS Pages, Inc or whatever it is.
Far more than are signed up here, which means what they want is available, and they’re not getting it. (Or, they just haven’t cleaned out their feeds in awhile.)
Anyway, even though it’s more likely the latter, I’ma have to put a new post over there, explicitly telling people I’m over here, and am now “I” instead of “we”. I just didn’t want you to get frightened if you see something over there – “we” aren’t back.
Anyway, because of CLE-NYK lasterday, I was forced to have the Ahmad Rashad/Gary Payton/Max Vebber NBATV show unleashed on me, which is the only way I know how to describe it.
What was the pitch on that?
We’ll make it just like the TNT show, except a less elaborate set, and instead of witty banter between complimentary personalities, we’ll just put whoever out there and hope Ahmad can keep it sane without slitting his throat. If things start to slip, we’ll just run continuous clips and pictures for three minutes straight, and have the guys literally just laugh harder than humanly possible, and make random noises like ‘whoop’, ‘whee’, or ‘wacka-wacka-wacka’.
Yes, because Photoshopped images, old clips of the hosts playing sports, and rampant CACKLING is what makes that TNT show work.
You just throw those three things out there, in any combo, and you’ve got a show.
Special guest star Richard Jefferson was so horrified he simply took off before halftime.
btw I am so, so, so very in love with airplanes right now.
I have an old friend who’s a legit literary critic (or something), so I asked him to give me his most pretentious review of the 2GG trailer.
Here it is:
Shall I compare you to Jean-Paul Belmondo in A Bout de Souffle instead? Ok then…your nonchalant, cat like nimble way with the guns reminded me of Jean-Paul Belmondo smoking his cheap cigarettes as he relieved an innocent passerby of his car, using the gun like his fist, and of course never ruffling his suit. There is perhaps a dash of the vengeful protagonist in Old Boy, a seething drive to act and kill based on the supreme truth of a profoundly unjust life.
That’s DVD cover material.
Anyway, the Cavs just kinda swatted the Nets aside as prep for the Lasers tonight, and as the game was in Jersey, the talk of course turned to where LeBron is going to play in 2010.
“When I decide to make that decision, it’s going to basically put me in a position where I feel I can win multiple championships,” James said. “If it’s staying here, I’ll be here, and if it’s moving elsewhere, then I’ll have to look at all my options.”
I haven’t done this in awhile, so let’s go ahead and discuss it.
Keep in mind, during my NBA sabbatical, I came to peace with the whole “LeBron will leave CLE thing”. If he goes, it won’t affect me one way or the other.
Honestly, I don’t have a gut feel on it right now. The people on message boards saying LBJ cares most about the people of Cleveland are delusional – let’s make that clear.
My breakdown, and none of these points smoothly connect with others. The point is nobody has a clear picture right now:
1) The most important thing to LeBron is his brand.
2) The best thing for the that brand is a championship.
3) The best place to do that, talent wise, right now, is in Cleveland.
4) Another good thing for the brand would be moving to the Knicks, obviously. (I think we can all agree NJ is out at this point, and the Lakers can’t afford him.)
5) In terms of sports history/legacy only, winning a title in Cleveland is far more valuable than winning one in NY.
6) If the Cavs win a championship in the next couple years, it makes it easier for him to leave, ie “I need new challenges”. (The key would be for the Cavs to win in 2010, so he looks like a huge jerk if he doesn’t defend it.)
What it comes down to is nobody knows what he’s doing, and it’s clear LeBron loves being famous, and loves toying with people’s perceptions even more.
As the NBA stand right now, if he leaves, he doesn’t really care about winning. There’s my contribution – like I said, I’m fine either way, and there’s no reason to talk about this until season after next.
I love the contact form – here’s another old school friend who got in touch:
Raja Bell () wrote: Choo choo!
Although Raja – how could you not fill in the “website” part?
I was talking this weekend with a book reader, and the book they had read was mine. 
Occasionally I get asked whatup with 
I have an old friend who’s a legit literary critic (or something), so I asked him to give me his most pretentious review of 
