BRAD RADBY’S PERFECT STRANGERS BEGINS (2008)
Directed by: Brad Radby
Starring: Bruce Willis, Antonio Banderas, Keira Knightly, Keanu Reeves, Hilary Swank
Box Office (US): $77M (Released in July 2008)
SYNOPSIS: At the start of the movie, Bruce Willis is Cousin Larry, and his Bahlki is Antonio Banderas, and they are new roommates in the big city. What Bruce doesn’t know is that Antonio is Mexican and not Meposian, and he’s also an assassin, sent to kill the President, who is Keanu Reeves.
Bruce’s wife is dead, and she is Hilary Swank in a quick cameo at the start, and then also later throughout the movie when he has bad dreams, and Hilary is like, “Bruuuuce…saaaave meee…I loooove youuu…” Bruce wakes up sweating and grabbing his gun when this happens the first two times, but not the third time, because he’s going to start growing as a person again by that point.
So one day Bruce is doing his job at the advertising agency, and Antonio comes to help, and he is trying to do his romancing on Bruce’s advertising colleague, who is Keira Knightly. Keira thinks Antonio is charming, but she asks Bruce why he was asking so much about the funny online internet viral video they are working on with the President, who remember is Keanu.
Bruce does some investigating when they go out to dinner, and Antonio smells the truth coming on, so he does karaoke to dodge the confrontationing, which is a Meposian song called The Dance of Joy. They are like “die-die-die-die-die, hey-hey-hey-hey!” and then Antonio picks up Bruce in his arms, and Bruce asks why the song has the word “die” in it. They look at each other like Bruce Willis, and that’s when Antonio knows he’s been caught in his murder lie.
They go home, and have a fight about being liars to each other, and Antonio explains that the viral video they’re making for Keanu is really a viral video that will make anyone who watches it die, and that he’s going to play it on TV in Mepose, and that’s why Antonio is here – to stop him.
Bruce says it’s too late, because Keira is taking the viral video to Keanu right now, and they’re about to have a race against time in Bruce’s cool Mustang. That’s when Keanu sends the army to get involved, and fires up his laptop computer to orchestrate the chase, and also he took Keira hostage, and is like, “no-no-no” with his finger when she tries to find a way to almost delete the viral video at the last second.
After the big car chase with the Army and a hilarious pair of ice cream truck drivers who are in over their heads, who are the original Bahlki and Larry, Bruce and Antonio get to the White House, and Keanu is about to push the button that says, “VIRAL VIDEO UPLOAD”, and there’s a fist fight, an explosion, a Keira Knightly rescue, and another fist fight, but not in that order.
They save the day, and Antonio comes to work at the ad agency, but Keanu gets re-elected, and nobody is the wiser. He is in the Oval Office and taps the map of Mepose, and goes, “boom”. This is how everyone knows there’s a sequel.
Over the credits everyone does the Dance of Joy like on the set between takes, and Hilary is back and she’s smoking a pipe so Bruce can find his happiness again.
