I have no idea why I got up at like 5am and started writing this while still in bed.

BRAD RADBY’S MOBY DICK

“Oh man, I’ve got to get that whale!”

Captain Nemo was on his boat and he was going to the ocean again because of that big whale he saw. He called his dad and asked what time the maid was bringing some more gas for the boat, and the maid said the boat took coal, and not gas, and that’s because it was 1810.

“Tidey-ho!”

As the boat workers made the sails on the boat happen, the Captain looked down at his peg leg and wondered where the time had gone, and how it used to be 1809, and soon it would be 1811, and he still wasn’t married.

He made a fist – he really wanted that whale bad now!

There’s a lot more of it – not sure if it’ll get finished or abandoned or what, but there it is. Why is my brain like this.

Wait, here’s Chapter 2. The one above was Chapter 1. All the chapters are this short.

LOL!

Below deck, the old man went back to work carving his little boy dolly out of wood. Just like he wanted that whale, he wanted his dolly to be a real boy.

“Maybe one day, Pornorkio…”

He sighed and made Pornokio do a little jig, and he did that by moving the strings that were on his little cute wood legs and arms, and also there was one on his neck.

A crash at the side of the boat messed up the jig, and Captain Nemo fell on the ground, and his peg leg broke.

“What happened?!” He yelled up to the slaves who were doing hard work on the boat. “Did we crash!?”

One of the slaves came down into the below deck part of the boat, because that’s where Nemo was, and he was the Captain, and also he owned the slave.

“‘Twas an iceberg! A grave of the high seas itself!”

Captain Nemo needed help up, but he was too mad at himself for forgetting he was supposed to be driving the boat instead of working on Pornokio.

Make it stop.

Brad Radby’s Brad Radby (The Complete Filmography: 1999-2023)