And Then Came the Rain

By On October 8, 2010 · 8 Comments · In Girls, Screenwriting

I know the big word on the street is I can’t write drama.

Pretty much I’m the one always saying this, so let me take a stab at it and see how it goes.

This just kinda formed itself in my head over the past 36 hours. It kept making me cry, so I thought, “Hey, maybe I can make drama now.”

EXT. TOWNHOUSE – MORNING

Establishing shot of the most romantic place that’s ever existed.

INT. TOWNHOUSE/BEDROOM – MORNING

A COUPLE lies in bed, staring into each other’s eyes. They are more in love than two people have ever been.

MAN

Being here...it’s like...

He gets a little choked up.

WOMAN

What is it like?

He squints his eyes ever so much – it’s masculine and romantic at the same time.

WOMAN (CONT’D)

Me too.

She fingers a horrible TATTOO on his shoulder.

Outside, the sounds of RAINDROPS plinker. It confuses him. Perhaps pains him.

WOMAN (CONT’D)

What is it again?

He stands, putting on his pants and heading for the door. He’s grim, tormented, angry even. The rain is coming down hard now. He looks at her like Bruce Willis.

MAN

You can keep my shoes.

He leaves, and she hears the door to her townhouse get ripped off the hinges and thrown down the hall.

She picks up his shoes and cries.

The part that makes me cry is how she mocks his shoulder tattoo, and then again when he selflessly gives her his shoes.

A third time is when the bill for that door comes, but that was a deleted scene. How much crying was in it for you.

 
  • http://twitter.com/alairson22 Andrew Lairson

    “Being here…it’s like…”
    -Man
    This part gets to me. It’s as if he can’t decide whether it’s love or agony.

  • http://brian23.com Brian

    Its the new “you complete me”

  • http://twitter.com/alairson22 Andrew Lairson

    I don’t think the Man knows where his should tattoo ends and he begins.

  • ZeroKNS

    There are tears, alright.

  • http://twitter.com/thegnc Andrew Rosin

    Is the squint that got to me.

  • http://twitter.com/venitalynn Venita Lynn

    I’m pretty upset that the place that’s the most romantic ever is in a townhouse. Couldn’t it have been in a Malibu mansion or something?

  • Adam J

    Pretty sure the rain is like a metaphor for salad food

  • http://robgokee.com Rob Gokee

    Sometimes, Brian, you’re so fucking brilliant and funny that I cry because I’m laughing so hard.

    This post, however, gave me heartburn, which was fixed by eating 6 carne asada tacos while watching “Die Hard,” and reciting the dialogue from every character that isn’t Bruce Willis.